Musings from a promise-collector

Posts tagged ‘Revelation 21:3-4’

Four Years Later

Four years can seem like a long time, but also like a breath. And this is especially true when you’ve lost someone you love.

They say each year gets a little easier, and in some ways I can say it does. After four years, it’s started to become ‘normal’, meaning, it is what it is. Well, most of the time. Then every once in a while, I momentarily forget and have the urge to call him. I had one of those moments earlier this year when I was having trouble with my jumper cables in the rain, no less. It’s one of those moments that a girl needs her dad. God has placed many good father-like men in my life, for which I am so grateful… but as much as I love them, it’s just not quite the same.

But, like I was saying, it does seem to get easier with each passing year. I am thankful that the day was not as hard as I thought it might be. I had a minor moment in Bible study this morning when we were singing a song about God being the Father to the fatherless. But I held it together… I didn’t really want to become a sobbing mess only 10 minutes into our study. Plus, I wasn’t wearing cry-proof mascara. And I hate breaking down into one of those ugly cries in front of such a large group. Ugly cries are reserved for those select few who know me so well that I don’t mind if they see me fall to pieces.


Feelings on Father’s Day

How do I even begin to talk about a day that brings such mixed emotions?

Sadness at the years of what could have been and can never be recaptured.

Joy that he is free from pain and sickness.

Thankful that God led us to reconciliation.

Sadness that our new-found relationship ended too soon.

Wistfully watching dads and daughters interacting.

So joyful that he is with Jesus now.

And so incredibly thankful that I have a Heavenly Abba who loves me. (more…)

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